Observe this rare photo...

This photo is of the rare Shirleyfongus Hawai'icanus (also known as mother-in-law, and to some simply as "binka") thriving in her natural habitat, the Safeway. The Shirleyfongus is seen here diligently gathering food for her young. This particular species is characterized by an intense affection for the offspring of its offspring. This photo was taken under duress by the most common prey of the Shirleyfongus, the son-in-lawus carry-the-grocerycus. Almost immediately after this photo was captured, the prey was buried under the crushing burden of another load of provisions bound for the gaggle's lair. The Safeway is a unique place in nature that contains many of the raw materials that the Shirleyfongus needs. She has a unique ability to then transform these materials into sustenance for all of her gaggle back in the lair. Today's outing was one of the many that are undertaken over the course of a day to augment the already enormous supply of provisions in the lair with small additions that will later be transformed into a delicious pile of food that will feed the gaggle for days to come. The Shirleyfongus is extraordinarily skilled at creating something called Jook, whose recipe has remained a mystery to researchers for many years. One of the great mysteries of this species is its tendency to keep many months worth of food on hand, even in the face of an unbelievable bounty of food within crawling distance of the lair.

Equally mysterious are the migration habits of this species. Rather than being seasonal, or based on its own mating patterns, the Shirleyfongus seems to migrate based on be the mating patterns of its offspring. Indeed it's true that if their own offspring do not themselves make offspring, the Shirleyfongus is rarely to be seen. But as soon as their young begin to produce young of their own, the migrations, sometimes across great distances, become far more frequent. The Spring 2011 migration has been particularly fascinating in that it is not clear when, or even if, the return migration will occur. And in one of the many intricate dances choreographed by Mother Nature, it would appear that the Spring 2011 migration has also miraculously happened to coincide with a once in a lifetime event for the Shirleyfongus - commonly referred to as The Retirement. It is not known for sure, but strongly suspected, that somehow The Retirement and the unusual migration pattern this year are in some way connected to the recent birth of another of the Shirleyfongus' offspring's offspring.

But what should not go untold in this, one of natures great mysteries, is the extent to which the alleged "prey" (the aforementioned son-in-lawus carry-the-grocerycus) is actually appreciative of the tireless efforts put forth by the Shirleyfongus. Without the tireless effort put forth by this very unique creature of the wild kingdom, the entire gaggle would suffer from severe exhaustion brought on by the recent birth of the newest offspring who, while a good sleeper, still seems to manage to wake up right about when REM sleep begins.

A roundabout way of getting there, but thank you. You're a tremendous help and we really appreciate it! (you too, Grandpa!)